Hypnosis – Mind Control – Persuasion – Influence – All of these charged words carry tremendous implications and, for many, an entire subset of associations that will, in effect, cause people to move towards a particular set of words and away from others.
Take for example. Two words… which, depending on their source, could be said to be the same thing, but actually have a tremendously powerful, yet surprisingly predictable and different response in those who hear them. The two words are: persuasion and manipulation.
There is often talk in the worlds of NLP, and even Ericksonian conversational hypnosis, that “you can’t not manipulate someone.”
It could be said to be true. But use the word manipulation in “any context of getting someone to do something (even if it’s for their own interests and desires) and you’ll instantly feel a very visceral ‘away from’ response that is wholeheartedly generated by conscious associations.” Attributed to the word manipulative (which, in my world view, is actually a higher level of abstraction than persuasion, but I digress)
In other words, people will recoil from the manipulative label, while being much more positively predisposed to being persuaded or engaging in persuasion. And, of course, that brings us to the bigger question of…so what?
Well, if you are going to participate in the “way of influence”, as I like to call it. So you have to be aware that despite the definition in the dictionary; and what the rules of meaning have to say: the precise word you use will create an emotional response that colors perception and frames the entire conversation or scenario in which you are engaging.
This is kind of a roundabout, but relevant way of transitioning to what I really want to talk about today, which is… Influence as a way of life.
You see, if you’re going to walk the path of influence (and we all do to some degree, it’s just that the average human is really bad at it), then you have to look at the world in the most efficient and useful way possible in to easily exert maximum influence. Now you may notice that I don’t use the word hypnosis very much in this post. There’s a reason, and it goes back to what our working definition of hypnosis really is.
Definition of hypnosis: the bypassing of the critical factor of the conscious mind and the establishment of acceptable selective thinking.
That is a great and powerful definition of what hypnosis is and it gives us tremendous versatility in the selection of tools and techniques available to us. But now let’s talk about covert hypnosis and finally conversational hypnosis before we get back to influence.
Covert hypnosis is the art and science of circumventing or “redirecting” the critical factor of the conscious mind and establishing acceptable selective thinking, without the use of a formal hypnotic contract or overt consensual form of hypnotic induction.
In other words, covert hypnosis is the study, practice, and use of the full spectrum of “hypnotic operators” for the specific purpose of (whether or not given express permission) to achieve the fulfillment of your wishes. This small detail is where many covert hypnotists fail: it’s an issue that has to do with the mindset surrounding how a person views the “deliberate” use of influence technologies, and in many ways, has to do directly with “What”. you, as an aspiring covert hypnotist, introduce yourself to him.
In future posts I will cover the main reasons why people fail covert hypnosis and its many derivatives; But for now, I want to focus on something much more fundamental and that is how to structure the way you view influence and give it a kind of hierarchy to follow, so that you can see why, naturally, start to recognize why. Use In CPI and Killer Influence is so devastatingly effective. And no, this is not a sales pitch, although I would love for you to buy my stuff and use it to get whatever you want, my purpose here is simply to make your life a lot easier.
Because the way the vast majority of trainers teach these skills is… well… SIMPLY INEFFECTIVE!
But for now, let’s go back a few paragraphs and discuss: conversational hypnosis. Conversational hypnosis: It is the derivation of the critical factor and the establishment of acceptable selective thinking through the use of a specific series of “hypnotic operators” based on the natural structures inherent in human language.
First, you need to break down what you do and follow a series of somewhat logical but intuitive steps. If you are going to study the method of Covert Hypnotic Influence that I am proposing (which is neither NLP nor Ericksonian, though it certainly borrows from those disciplines as it borrows from many others), then you should follow several basic rules and adhere to logical progression. to exert influence.
Rules of thumb – Rule #1 – Keep what you do simple – The kissing rule really applies here when it comes to exerting influence because if the technique is too difficult to apply in the seminar room, which is decidedly a controlled environment … Won. t I work in the real world on real living human beings.
Second rule: always start with the result in mind. Sounds like common sense, but unfortunately, common sense isn’t that common, understanding? Your result is the beacon in the distance that allows you to make constant course corrections throughout your persuasion process. Influencing is rarely a linear process, and you have to be constantly paying attention to the subject to know exactly how to navigate through the many twists, turns, and turns that occur in any hypnotic interaction.
Which brings us to a third two-part rule of thumb – Part 1 – learn to pay attention to your subject on a level most human beings will never know. Why? Well, so you know what kind of effect you’re having on your subject, if you have no idea what effect the tool, tactic, or strategy you’re using is actually having on your subject. How the hell will you know if your moving towards getting what you want?
Part 2 of Rule Number Three is just as important: your subject will tell you everything you need to know in order to influence him, but will almost always communicate it primarily through methods, characteristics, and traits that are OUTSIDE YOUR AWARENESS and CONTROL. AWARE. Let’s talk about that for a minute –
Bottom line: anything outside of your awareness is out of your control… Period. Do you want to try it?
Very simply, one of the most fundamental methods we have to alter our own state of mind is to control our breathing. Other than our extremities, it’s probably the most influential voluntary response of all. Here’s the game… Try to control your breathing WITHOUT paying attention to it… See what I mean? Notice that the moment you focus your mind on your breath it is very easy to change the rate, depth, speed, etc. But the moment your mind goes elsewhere, your control evaporates.
NOW if you have studied NLP you most likely know that one of the quickest ways to build a relationship with another human being is through something called pacing and leading and one of the techniques we use to build rapport is monitoring someone else’s respiratory rate, and, if you have any skills when you do this…
That person begins to breathe in time with you out of “their own” awareness. What’s up with that? Do you mean that the only way we can control something is by being aware of it? For the most part. Yes, that’s exactly what I’m telling you. That’s good news and bad news because as you deepen your training, your awareness naturally expands. The once arbitrary barriers between conscious awareness and unconscious awareness begin to thin and dissolve more and more until finally only one remains: awareness.
You’ll automatically begin to intuitively notice that things seem to literally jump out at you as they’re completely blown away by everyone else in the room…even if you point at them! It’s a little weird, but it’s empowering because as you literally start to “see the matrix” life becomes more and more interesting and it becomes easier and easier to exert influence. Oh wait there’s that word again…
Influence, not mind control, not hypnosis, not covert hypnosis, not conversational hypnosis, not seduction, not salesmanship, communication, etc, etc. Why influence? Because… all of these disciplines and more are simply subsets of Influence. All forms of influence (this is true often enough to be feasibly true for our purposes here) are inherently hypnotic. Hey?
So why not call it all hypnosis? Well, honestly that’s already been done. (I’m not going to steal the thunder from Bandler or Grinder) But there’s more. It all comes down to the whole issue of persuasion vs. manipulation versus influence. You see persuasion, by its very nature, and even manipulation (which is often seen as synonymous with coercion). involves a conscious choice. Influence, on the other hand, is often exerted “out of awareness”, and does not necessarily depend on a conscious choice. A small but important distinction, especially for the aspiring student of the hypnotic influence.
Do this exercise right now. Find something on or near your desk that is completely inanimate. Place it on the table or surface in front of you. Now muster all your powers of persuasion, come up with your most well-thought-out reason/argument, logically or emotionally based, pattern or hypnotic language process, and… convince that object to move. (No, I’m not kidding)
I bet the object wasn’t responding beautifully. Trust me, there is a point to this exercise. Now all I want you to do now is think of as many ways as you can to influence that object to move. You may notice that suddenly progress is much easier, you have many more tools to work with, and before long, you find a way to move the object.
That is the difference between persuasion and influence. There are many more ways to get people to comply with your wishes than just getting them to make a conscious voluntary decision. And yet, when the non-conscious hypnotic operators are applied correctly, that person’s volitional-conscious mind will present all the necessary reasons for wanting to do what you are influencing him to do. Persuasion is often achieved as a byproduct of influence.
Persuasion is a form of influence, but it is not the entire spectrum of influence. And since the vast majority of influence phenomena are directly equivalent to a “hypnotic operator”, meaning they have the ability to circumvent or redirect the critical factor, they; by default, it falls into the category of “covert hypnosis.” So this post is getting too long, but… Get this…
For those who choose to walk the path of the warrior of the mind, the master of covert hypnotic influence, the goal is fulfillment. Influence is the medium. Influence and persuasion are not the same. All forms of persuasion are a form of influence, but not all forms of influence are a form of persuasion. Some of your most powerful tools of influence lie outside your subject’s consciousness.
Your subject will tell you everything you need to know if you learn to pay attention. If something is out of your awareness, it is also out of your control. We’ll pick this up in my next post and. With that I leave you with one of the most powerful quotes I have ever heard and it is literally true.
“If I know you better than you know me I can influence you, if I know you better than you know yourself I CAN CONTROL YOU!”