There is a blessing in the joy of shared laughter. Give it a try: Get cartoons or jokes popping up on your computer every day, share a joke you’ve received via email, or talk to friends and co-workers about the funny scene from the latest hit movie. Laughter will lower your blood pressure, calm your pulse, and generally help you, your friends and family to release a lot of stress. Healing experts now say that laughter and humor, hope and happiness are an important part of any healing process.
The benefits of laughter are numerous, and frequent warm laughter in your relationships indicates that all is well and gives you both confidence that problems can be overcome.
If something frustrating is going on, try easing the tension with a little humor to turn the stress into nonsense. Don’t make fun of your partner, but use shared humor as a way of saying “I know this is hard, but we’ll get over it.” Your partner will think of you as reassuring and helpful to be around when problems arise, because you represent fun and happiness for each other.
A light-hearted approach to serious business is often the most productive. Imagine what your days would be like if you concentrated on having fun and making you and your partner laugh. Fun is good for your health too: telling your partner how nice your child (or pet) said or watching a funny movie or TV show will lower your blood pressure, calm your pulse, and generally help release a lot of stress. Laughing with your partner is good for your heart, gives you some aerobic exercise, and reminds you both of how good you are to each other. Shared laughter also syncs your emotional rhythms, making it easier for you and your partner to feel connected and intimate with each other.
Loving and shared laughter also enhances self-acceptance. The paradox seems to be that having permission to play like a child also gives permission to be responsible and accept yourself. When they don’t make nasty jokes or mean comments about each other and their love, and instead goof around, they can laugh and feel good about it. It’s also hard to hold a grudge against the person in your life who makes you laugh the easiest. Give it a try and you’ll soon find yourself looking for ways to make others laugh. Try pressing your partner’s “laugh buttons” and tickling his funny bone and you will see how much fun it is.
Instead of hoarding old grudges and hurts, learn to hoard old jokes and funny phrases. Shared laughter can evoke an overwhelming sense of warmth and caring for one another. The endorphins released by mutual humor flow through both of you and create joy. Humor is the secret both to keeping your love fresh and alive and to feeling confident that you won’t lose your specialty to each other.
The less you fight, the more you will laugh and play. Fighting can become addictive and used in relationships to structure time; But when you replace the drama of fighting with the delight of humor, you can create a positive addiction; and a powerful solution for knowing what to do with your time together.