“Because I?” That’s actually a million dollar question because there’s really no definitive answer available. The sad news is that this question often leads to one thing: a pity party.
Self-pity is actually a very negative emotion. It gets you nowhere at all. In fact, it leads you into a darker abyss as you start to become irrational or lose sight of more important things. You let go of other people and personal relationships as the focus shifts to you.
How do you control yourself so you don’t go through a period of self-pity? The following tips may be what you need:
1. Know that things happen for a reason. You may not be able to understand what happened or even have the answer to the question, but trust that there is a good explanation for why it happened anyway. It could be to teach you a lesson, to open up better opportunities for you, to make you a better person, or to help you realize the things you’ve been missing. Just don’t bother too much with the question. Allow the true meaning to unfold before your eyes. You just need to be very patient.
2. Cry and then move on. Many of those who feel sorry for themselves are people who suffered but never moved on. They are stuck. You really allow yourself to enjoy the pain and suffering that you are going through.
Dueling is definitely not a bad idea. In fact, we encourage you to experience it, especially if you definitely have a tremendous loss or rejection. But it is necessary to put a limit to the mourning period. Say to yourself: “I will cry, but next week I will definitely put this pain aside and start again.” That helps remind you that there is no point indulging in suffering and hurting yourself over and over again.
3. Count your blessings. This is why you shouldn’t wallow in self-pity. You no longer remember the blessings in your life. After all, you are too focused on your miseries. Counting blessings is one of the best ways to remind yourself that life is still good to you. For example, if you lose your job, consider your family togetherness a blessing. Many are going through divorces and bad marriages. If you can’t travel next week, consider it a few extra days for other productive activities.
It definitely helps if you can write your blessings in an electronic notebook or journal. Write down all the blessings you can think of, no matter how silly or small (like getting your favorite brand of makeup).
4. Change your way of thinking. All you need to do is have a change of perspective. Instead of paying a lot of attention to yourself, try to pass it on to others. Instead of thinking about how weak you are, gather inner strength.
Because you’re used to self-pity, it may not be the easiest for you. statements and subliminal messages then it can be useful.
You can listen to mp3 or watch videos with subliminal messages that speak of inner strength, peace and hope.