A confrontation card is a card that confronts a situation, problem, or dispute. A specific objective is sought by the recipient that is not usually granted without resistance.
The writer wants a certain goal, and the recipient of the letter will not grant that goal unless convincingly persuaded that they should.
Here are some tips on how to effectively structure a ‘confrontation letter’:
1. Appearance is very important. The letter should be a hard copy and look impressive and professional. You should use good quality paper and have the letter printed by a good printer on professional-looking letterhead.
Emails don’t project the impressive image that is truly effective.
Emails are unimpressive and these days a hard copy is becoming more and more rare. For that reason, the appearance of a printed letter that looks impressive means that the letter is a serious letter and written by a writer who deserves serious consideration. An impressive printed letter stands out from the crowd.
Have you ever noticed how much more respect a man gets with a well-made suit? The same principle applies and the physical appearance of the letter is very important and should project the writer as a serious, refined and educated person.
Implicit behind this projected image is the fact that the writer has the ability and the means to take the matter further, that is, before the recipient’s superiors and/or the authorities that oversee the conduct of the recipient and their organization.
The serious and impressive appearance of the letter projects the clear understanding that the author is the type of person who can subsequently refer the matter to an attorney for further action if the request for relief is denied.
What also needs to be considered is the mindset of the recipient of a confrontation letter. That is, a recipient of a confrontation letter’s greatest fear is that his decision not to grant his request may be overruled by his superiors.
So, if the recipient has received an impressive-looking letter that is persuasively written, this basic fear of being nullified will weigh heavily on their mind. He may grant the request for fear that the letter will look like a ‘trouble’ both in appearance and content. Therefore, he may decide to quickly grant the request and close the file. The recipient will save negative responses for letters that don’t seem “problematic.” I have personally experienced this situation many times and that is why I place special emphasis on the physical aspect of the card.
A word processor can easily create a professional-looking letterhead. I recommend a border around the page and paragraphs being justified on both sides to give the letter a distinctly professional appearance. If you have a title or some type of designation, include it on your letterhead.
I’m not suggesting that if you have a weak argument, an impressive-looking card will itself be effective. What I am suggesting, however, is that a letter that is impressive, in every way, is likely to ensure that the persuasive argument contained in that letter receives the serious attention and careful treatment that it deserves. And that goal is more than half the battle!
2. The letter must be well documented and well organized. If there is background and supporting information that needs to be passed on to the recipient, then that information must be included, accurate, and complete. To keep the letter itself to a minimum, you should consider putting supporting information in an appendix attached to the letter.
The package placed in front of the recipient must be total so that the reader does not have to obtain other records to confirm or understand the situation correctly. This is also the mark of a professional and will have a positive impact on the recipient. The recipient will feel that he is dealing with a professional who has things clear and that feeling will increase his concern.
3. The letter must be completely professional in tone and content and must project a distinctive tone of civility and respect. Deviating from this standard gives the recipient an excuse to place the request in the category of an unreasonable request. After a request has been characterized as ‘unreasonable’, whether justified or unjustified, it is very difficult to reinstate that request.
4. If there are facts that need to be stated, make sure they are stated clearly and in short paragraphs of one or two sentences at the beginning of the letter. Short sentences and paragraphs are easier to read and the information contained is easier to digest. You want your factual case to be very clear and you should consider numbering these paragraphs so that the recipient can easily refer to them by number.
5. State the request as briefly as possible and justify why the recipient should agree to the request. Make your argument as short and simple as possible. Your letter should be as brief as possible because if you go off the rails and add more detail, you may put something where an unscrupulous recipient may unfairly deny your request. The touchstone: make things as clear and simple as possible.
6. End the letter happily. Indicate that you hope the reader will recognize the merits of his position and invite him to respond if something is not clear. I find the following sentence to be particularly effective: ‘If you cannot accept my application or if I am wrong on any of the facts, or on any other aspect of the case I have outlined, please advise me specifically.’
If the recipient gives you a detailed explanation of why they reject your request, it will be your roadmap for further attempts to persuade them to accept your request. It can also embarrass you in a closed case when your response is inappropriate and can be reviewed by a superior.
If the recipient does not provide you with a detailed explanation as to why they reject your request, that fact can be used to suggest in a later letter that the recipient is not being reasonable in considering your request.
7. Never refer to your ‘request’ as a ‘demand’. It should be respectfully framed as a “request.”
8. Always end the letter with ‘Respectfully yours’.
That ‘respectful’ ending further and emphatically confirms that the letter has been sent respectfully, which is crucial.
If the recipient responds in a professionally disrespectful or less than respectful manner, then the contrast between their approach and yours is starkly contrasted. This fact will be to your advantage when the letter and the entire situation is reviewed by someone else… ie someone with authority over the responder, a regulator, another interested third party, etc.
Many of these confrontational situations are narrowly won and can easily go one way or the other. The fact that your letter(s) is(are) reasonable and respectful may make the crucial difference. Rarely have I seen a disrespectful and irrational letter achieve its goal. It is much more difficult to deny a request in a polite, respectful, well-written letter.
9. Do not end the letter with a ‘cc’ for the regulator or any other third party that may present themselves as an authority to the recipient. It is completely inappropriate, unprofessional and the mark of an amateur.
Reference to a third party may be appropriate at a later stage, but the first letter should stand on its own and should not make the recipient feel like they have a gun to their head.
The recipient knows very well that he can appeal to a higher authority and does not have to be reminded. Most first responders are very sensitive to this problem, so why antagonize him by waving that threat in his face? Does he really want to antagonize the person he is trying to convince?
10. A demand in the letter for a response within a specific time frame is completely inappropriate and unnecessarily irritating to the recipient and should not be inserted into your first letter.
Real professionals fully understand that a timely response should always be provided and some responders take the request for a quick response as an indication of desperation or impatience and a weakness to be exploited. For that reason, many first responders will deliberately delay their response to exasperate the writer and perhaps provoke an overblown letter that usually always benefits the recipient.
Forget asking for a quick or timely response – you have no control over that fact, why bring it up?
In fact, a late response can be an advantage in your favor at a later stage. A slow response can look bad when reviewed later and will tend to indicate that perhaps the recipient of your letter is being unreasonable, dragging their feet unnecessarily and acting inappropriately.
11. Make sure there is nothing in your letter that can be criticized. Don’t let your anger show. Remember that at some point this letter will most likely be reviewed by others and must be completely above reproach. An understandable mild expression of exasperation may be to prove a point but nothing more.
12. If you have the luxury of time, sleep on the card and come back to it when you’re cool.
It’s amazing what a fresh set of eyes can see and also what other points can happen to you as you go about your regular schedule.
Review the letter critically and modify it to be as concise as possible and flow smoothly. Remember that the key to good writing is ‘rewriting’.
If possible, have a friend who has good judgment and good writing skills proofread it. A good second opinion coupled with constructive criticism can be invaluable.