1. An artist got into a time machine. He pushed the control panel to go back to the Old West, 1850. When he got there, he opened the machine door. He didn’t survive after getting there, as an outlaw saw how weird he was dressed and challenged him to a gunfight. When the villain said, “Draw!” The artist took out his drawing pad and pencil.
2. Bill and Susan, a couple of university students who secretly met every night in a barn. This comes from years ago. It could be said that their relationship was… “stable”.
3. In 1970, a father sat down with his son to talk. The father talked to him about “birds and bees.” But the conversation was interrupted when the son received a call from the US Army recruiting department, telling him that the Army Corps wanted him to go immediately to Ft. Bliss in Texas by tomorrow. Five years passed and the son went to college and graduated Magna Cum Laude in four years. He married and had several children. Before that, he started working at a top investment firm in New York City. It was not until the year 2000 that he returned to his parents’ house. He looked at his father and asked, “Do you remember before you left home to join the army, we never finished talking about ‘birds and bees’?”
4. A chemistry teacher was invited into a classroom full of high school students. He asked them to go outside, where he showed them some interesting reactions between products like soda, toothpaste, and Mentos breath fresheners. The reactions were incredible foams of all colors. He told the class to go home and look for safe products that, when combined, would generate interesting and fun reactions like the one he did today. The next day, the children brought sodas and baking soda that created a volcanic foam. Another found a creative way to blow up a banana with firecrackers. The only child left spoke very little. He said he went to the nuclear reaction plant where his father worked and pulled out a cell phone and told his father to “turn it on.” “Mine is a nuclear explosion.” Before everyone stopped laughing at him, in a matter of seconds, there was an explosion so fierce that it burned down the city and the school.
5. If you’ve seen the movie “Rudy” about a college kid who’s obsessed with Notre Dame football and goes to big fields to play for them, you’ll love the skit called “Ruddy” in which a kid who’s obsessed with playing football for Vanderbilt University.
6. So, a teenager and his older sister are in the attic looking for old furniture. After finding what they’re looking for, the sister tells her brother to “turn off that light.” So, she raises her hand and extends her middle finger on the switch.