Feng Shui has many definitions, and my simplest descriptors are:
o The process of maximizing our experience of an environment.
o An environment that feels safe and secure.
There are several environments: Mind, body, home, work, relationships, mode of transportation, etc. When it comes to mind, body, and relationships, there are entrances and exits; In other words, positive thoughts and actions attract positive reactions. When it comes to loving, being in love, and having others share our experience, Feng Shui is definitely a tool for your toolbox.
There are many types of Feng Shui. What most people think of when talking about marriage is the area of ”love” or “marriage.” That is western feng shui (black sect). Some of what we’ll cover below applies to Western Feng Shui, and some doesn’t.
We are focusing on classical Feng Shui, which goes beyond the area of love or marriage. In this approach, all areas affect love and marriage. For example, the NW of a church, a reception hall, or your home affects the male head. The SW affects the female head. The North affects communication, the South affects the heart, and so on. Because all areas affect love, and if you are merging a family, certain directions (and the energies there) affect children.
Classical Feng Shui works holistically and is more comprehensive. If any area is out of balance, love and/or marriage can be undermined. If there is separation or divorce energy, it needs to be managed. If there is love energy, that also needs to be managed.
People have asked me for years how to maximize their engagements, weddings, honeymoons, and homes. This article provides some useful ideas. The top six tips are listed here. More details are provided later.
1. Advance planning
As you will read below, there are several considerations during the pre-planning phase. Timing (selecting the date) is the number one tip, as it has a ripple effect. Events that start on a day of good energy are more likely to stand the test of time.
2. The wedding party
Honor people’s personal energies and make the experience a win-win.
3. The wedding experience
Communication equals satisfaction. Create a plan; sign up others to help, then work on the plan.
4. The honeymoon
Select a location that supports both of you (based on tip number two). When you do this, pleasure and relaxation increase.
5. Your home
A Feng Shui consultation of your home is a gift that keeps on giving. The analysis produces an action plan that can then be addressed with your gift registry (solutions that may be needed). Ask for the right start to support your relationship, your health, and your success in life.
6. Gratitude
Similar to Feng Shui, life is a journey, not a destination. They are starting a life together. Remember to close each day by reflecting on what you are grateful for. Even when there is a breakdown, it leads to a breakthrough.
For advance planning, consider these additional tips:
o It is said that everything worth doing is worth doing well. Regarding a date analysis, some people only advise on “wedding” dates. Some tips are based on your western astrology birth date. Here again, our analysis is more complex and comprehensive. We consider dozens of factors so you can schedule with confidence (engagement, applying for your marriage license, travel dates for guests, when to have the wedding, ceremony start time, when to sign contracts, when to make deposits on services, when have the reception, honeymoon travel dates, move-in dates, etc.).
o Your ring design may be influenced by Feng Shui. An example is if you are a person of earth and your partner is fire; the earth is yellow, tan, brown and square; fire is red, pink, purple and triangle. You can select a ring with a square diamond in the center and triangular diamonds (or red gemstones) on the side.
o An eco-friendly approach could be rings with recycled or labor-free gems or metals. It’s always a good idea to clean your rings before wearing them. Cleaning (or clearing) jewelry goes beyond removing dirt from it. It is a process of mounting them with energies. A ring that someone else tried on or used has your energy. If the stone cutter (or the person who sized the ring) was upset, that energy is in the ring.
o Make sure the engagement party location has good energy. If not, there is usually something that can be done.
o Location and site analyzes for the wedding ceremony and reception hall are very important. Even when there’s strong negative energy, there’s usually a simple (and temporary, since you don’t own the site) fix. Keep in mind that good Feng Shui should be felt, not seen. There should be no obvious trinkets or statues around.
o Consider having the ceremony and reception at green (earth and animal friendly) sites. Use eco-friendly materials and decorations. At a wedding, instead of throwing rice, we use grass and flower seeds. At another wedding, instead of buying flowers, guests brought flowers to match the color scheme. Their originality was incredible (added to the anticipation and amusement of the guests) and some were even homegrown.
o Establish and follow a budget. Avoid shock and regret that can diminish the glow. Local vendors are a green approach because they not only cost less, but are better for the environment.
o When it comes to photography, go digital. Upload the images to a website where people can buy the ones that interest them the most. It makes a difference when people buy it for themselves (versus an open paperback). You can always choose to ‘gift’ them a photo or two.
o Explore an organic menu with your provider. Again, that usually means locally grown food helping local farmers.
o The cake, like your rings, can be Feng Shui according to your energies and those of your partner.
Let’s explore the wedding party in more detail:
o The bride and groom each have their own energy according to the date of birth, time of birth and place of birth. We want to honor your energies in everything we do (invitations, wedding colors, wedding attire, venue selection, standing positions during the ceremony, food selection, gifts, music, seat selection, honeymoon location, and we already mentioned the rings and the cake ).
o The energy of the couple also determines their compatibility. Sometimes we choose partners with similar tastes, and sometimes we choose partners that require more work. It doesn’t mean it won’t work, it just requires more work. Feng Shui helps smooth out rough edges. In one case, the dates were particularly challenging. Her elements were opposites, so what was good for her was not good for him. The scope of the analysis (due to complexity) required a search every day for a span of two years, and then only produced five dates to work with. It was worth the research!
o Also, when it comes to communication, strengths and weaknesses are identified. Then we can choose to recognize the strengths and develop our weaknesses. This is a key component to a long-term relationship.
o The energy of the couple determines their individual sleeping directions. If they are opposite, a compromise process begins. Their energy also relates to their choice of home and whether they are undermined or supported.
o The attraction of the bride and/or groom is a factor. An eco-friendly approach could be a used or heirloom garment. In this case, a cleaning is in order.
o The attractiveness of the wedding party is another consideration. If (based on their individual energies) most of the group is fire (as an example), we may want to downplay the color red.
o When it comes to gifts for the wedding party, you can select gifts that complement your personal energy; or you can keep it even simpler… give them environmental donations (trees planted in their name, stars named after them, etc.).
Regarding the wedding experience:
o A wedding or reception venue that has excess electromagnetic frequencies (EMF) or geopathic stress can agitate people. Hot tempers or people who seek excess on their special day are not pleasant experiences. Minimize these effects to be present in the joy and harmony that this day reflects.
o If you plan to have an external reception, the flow and configuration can be improved.
On the subject of honeymoon, you already know that timing, location, fun, and relaxation are a dynamite combination. In one case, we helped a couple avoid a typhoon!
As mentioned, your home can undermine your relationship, your health, and your success; or improve them. Instead of items that sit on a shelf to be used from time to time, your gifts could manifest a brighter future. Now that’s a great gift!
If, at this point, you’re thinking there’s too much to deal with… Feng Shui actually simplifies the process. It is our job to find out the details and present you with a plan of action. We hear, time and time again, that this saved customers time, effort and money. Get it right the first time and everyone benefits.
In conclusion, let’s go back to the previous Feng Shui definitions. You have set the stage for you and your partner, the wedding party and your guests to maximize the experience… things flow more smoothly. There are fewer financial or emotional surprises to react to, fewer delays or cancellations, fewer overall conflicts. Actions are more purposeful (efficient and effective), which translates to less stress and more enjoyment. After all, that’s why you’re sharing your wedding in the first place.