Oddly enough, one of the most common times a man cheats in a marriage is in the weeks and months after the birth of his first child. It seems like such a strange time to have an affair, but for many men it is exactly when they cheat on their wives for the first time. Because right now? Why cheat at a time when they should be celebrating a new life together?
The Center of Your Universe Changes
Believe it or not, for many men it all comes down to the fact that the center of the universe has shifted. The moment he found out about his baby, his life focused on one thing: the child he is expecting. You start making plans, choosing nursery furniture and knitting baby booties. Suddenly, he’s no longer the center of your universe and he’s not ready to deal with it.
When the baby arrives, there is a mixed reaction of “hooray!” and “oh no!” to keep it tied up for quite some time. He loves them both, but really feels out of his element at the moment. Unfortunately, new moms are so busy and so tired that they rarely have time (or attention span for that matter) to notice subtle changes in their husbands.
Body changes and a new perspective
Another common problem that leads to affairs after the birth of a baby is the fact that many men suddenly see their wives differently. Fortunately, this is not universal, but it is common enough to be problematic for many marriages.
The problem is that once you have had a baby you have become someone’s mother. For some men, that resemblance between you and his own mother is too much for him to even consider touching you now that you’ve had his baby.
Unfortunately, that doesn’t change the way either of them feels about the other. He can love you very much and still cheat on you. Most men who cheat for this reason do not cheat for lack of love. They cheat because they still have needs, but now they can’t turn to you to meet those needs.
waiting for you to heal
No matter what the doctor says, there are times when husbands think you must not be healthy yet. Some men run home at the first opportunity, while others delay and delay. He still has needs and another woman is likely ready to step in and offer to meet those needs for him, but the bottom line is that you have his new bright and sunny baby, so he will come back to you.